Nessie's Question
by Ellie Marsy
Summary: Renesmee has a question for her overprotective family.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: This one came to me out of the blue. I wondered at how the overprotective Cullens would react when sweet little Nessie would bring this up.

Let me know your thoughts! Tell me if there are any characters I didn't really get right. I'm trying to write stuff about the other Cullens.

Disclaimer: If you think I own Twilight, then you must be a unicorn.

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"Mommy, Daddy, where do babies come from?"

At that moment, time for the Cullens flew to a stop. Edward looked up from the newspaper he was reading and froze completely as he seemed to grow even paler. Bella clasped a hand to her mouth and looked at her daughter in despair. Carlisle was in the middle of calling someone when his mouth hung open. Esme was slicing carrots for a salad and her hand hung frozen in midair. Emmett and Rosalie stared at Renesmee from the loveseat, Rosalie looking livid and Emmett looking plain blank. Jasper, who was impossible to distract while reading, glanced from Nessie to her parents with a dumbfounded look. Alice's head popped up from behind the computer and glanced at the whole scene with her mouth agape.

"What?", Renesmee asked innocently. "I think I'm old enough to know. And don't tell me that they're delivered by the stork". She hissed slightly.

It was true. Though she was technically only one and a half years old, Nessie already resembled a 17-year old teenager. Bella and Edward were adamant when it came to discussing these things with their daughter.

"B-baby... I-I- um...", Bella dropped off and buried her face in his hands. She never did have this talk with Renee or Charlie. One day she snuck into Renee's room and caught her watching an R-rated movie and the question had been solved. "Carlisle?"

Carlisle snapped his phone shut and pondered. "Well Nessie...", he walked over to her and sat beside her on the couch. "You came from you mother. You grew inside her stomach."

"I know that. I was just wondering how I got there."

"Oh!", Bella got up from her seat and started fanning herself. "Jasper, Jasper, Jasper!"

Jasper bit back a laugh as he walked over to Bella and sent her calming emotions.

Carlisle exhaled deeply. "You are old enough." He looked at Edward, who was so still someone could have painted a portrait of him, and Bella who might collapse if Jasper let go of her.

"When a man and a woman love each other very much, just like your dad and mom love each other, they..."

"... Have sex?", Renesmee's eyes were as innocent as ever.

Bella collapsed and Jasper caught her. Rosalie gripped the loveseat so hard it started to crumble. Emmett looked a little amused.

"Where did you hear about that, Nessie?", he asked. Rosalie whacked him on the head.

"From Mom and Dad."

Edward's head turned sharply toward Nessie. "I didn't-... We-we never-"

"And from Grandma and Grandpa. And Uncle Emmett and Aunt Rosalie. And Uncle Jasper and Aunt Alice."

Truth dawned on Edward and he went to Jasper and Bella. "Calm. Me. Now."

"Oh God, Renesmee. Are you saying you saw-...", Bella looked like she could have puked.

"I didn't see... I mean I heard-...", Esme gasped. "I went away before anything... happened. I figured it was something private. I'm practically seventeen, you know. You can't protect me from these things forever..."

There was no other sound in the Cullen household other than the ants crawling under the floor. Everyone practically jumped when it rained suddenly.

"Was it scary?", Emmett whispered. Rosalie hissed and hit Emmett with her lethal elbow jab.

"No... What I saw... I saw how much you all loved each other... and it was kind of sweet."

The mood of the house calmed slightly.

"And I do have Sex Ed class, you know.", Renesmee blurted out to prevent another painful silence.

Carlisle sighed. "You're right, Nessie. You are old and mature enough." He glanced at Edward and Bella. "Maybe it is about time you learn about these things."

Edward closed his eyes shut and nodded sharply. Bella put a hand to her chest and mumbled something which sounded like approval.

Renesmee beamed. "You can trust me with these things... And um...", she blushed. "There were these other things I was wondering about... I didn't really think that you'd like me saying them so I wrote it down."

She took out a crumpled piece of paper and walked toward her parents. She shyly handed the paper to Edward, who uncrumpled it. Bella peered at it from behind his shoulder.

They both yelled at the same time.

"JASPER!!"


	2. Chapter 2

First of all, I'd like to thank all the people that added Chapter 1 to their Favorites/Story Alerts!

I didn't actually plan on making this two parts. I didn't actually make any changes to Chapter 1, but I decided to change the intended ending from Bella and Edward yelling at Jasper for some major calming action to Bella and Edward yelling at Jasper because Jazz is guilty for whatever is on the paper. I hope this makes for a better ending. :)

P.S.: I'm still not explaining fully what exactly is there, but you get the hint!

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or Jasper!.... :(

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"What?", Jasper asked, bewildered.

"WHAT IS THIS?!", Bella demanded shaking a crumpled piece of paper in front of his face.

"It's... paper?"

"Don't play coy with me Jasper Hale!!"

Jasper took the paper from Bella's shaking hand. He flinched at the fury he felt from her. He unfurled the paper and only let a hint of realization fall on him before his mind went completely blank.

"Oh..."

"You're the only one in the family with knowledge of these... things...", Edward added with a cringe. He squinted at his brother. "You're hiding something. You're thinking in French! You did teach these things to Nessie!"

Jasper stared at the words Nessie had written. "That-that may be true. This one came from Emmett, though." He pointed at a word at the bottom of the list.

"Hey!", Emmett raised his hands defensively.

Rosalie struck him on the back of the head. "How dare you teach those things to Nessie!"

"No! Look, okay? I'm the guilty one, I told those to Nessie.", Jasper admitted.

"Re-nes-mee!", Bella enunciated each syllable through gritted teeth.

"Renesmee."

"No! Uncle Jas-"

"It's alright, Nessie. Your parents have a right to know."

"That's it. I'm revoking your ice-cream-visit status!", Bella looked truly frightening.

Nessie gasped."But I love going on ice cream runs with-"

"Wait til I get to you, young lady!", she waved a finger threateningly.

"Alright, look. I'm sorry. I won't teach Renesmee those... words again."

He could feel Bella's anger ebbing away slightly, though her eyes still bulged and her chin jutted out menacingly. Edward still looked at Jasper suspisciously, trying to probe into his thoughts, which he rarely did voluntarily.

____

Jasper managed to slip out of the house after Bella and Edward had given him a long and agonizing speech about morality and responsibility. He ran as far from the house as he could, with the excuse that he had to hunt. When he was far away from within earshot of Edward, he fell to the ground doubled up in laughter.

They thought that it was him who told Renesmee about those words. He felt slightly guilty at his reaction, but couldn't help it. All the while, his family was forgetting who was truly capable of letting those words slip in a fit of anger. The one Cullen whose temper was unmatched. He whirled around when he felt the familiar emotions.

"Did they get mad?", Alice was huddled next to a tree emanating guilt.

"Yeah, they were pretty pissed.", Jasper smiled and opened his arms. Alice walked into his embrace.

"I'm sorry I left you to deal with the wrath of Edward and Bella."

"Apparently, it's your wrath I should be frightened of dealing with. Honestly Alice, the list extends past a count of thirty..."

Alice giggled while Jasper kissed the top of her head. They both looked up when they heard someone approach. Renesmee peered at them from behind a tree as though she was afraid that she had intruded on a private moment.

"Nessie?", Jasper asked.

"I'm sorry, Uncle Jazz. I didn't expect them to react that way."

"It's alright", he smiled. "What are you doing out here, though?"

"Mom and Dad put me under house arrest."

Alice laughed. "They'll be livid if they find out that you broke the law."

"I just don't get why they have to react that way. I mean, I'm old enough and I've seen much worse!" Jasper and Alice both raised their eyebrows. "I just mean that... I wished they trusted me more."

"Nessie, your parents are just being overprotective of you. They do trust you. This kind of behavior is just natural for them. In time, they will trust you with more mature matters. You just have to be patient." Nessie smiled slightly. "Uhm... You do know never to use these words... ever, right?"

Nessie nodded sheepishly.

Jasper chuckled. "Now get going kiddo, before your parents doom us all to house arrest."

Nessie rolled her eyes and laughed before she ran back toward Edward and Bella's cottage. Alice looked up into Jasper's eyes and they both laughed.

"You know Edward will find out it was me sooner or later, right?"

"Ah, let him. By the time he finds out our diabolical plan we'll be far away in Mexico."

Alice laughed. Jasper smiled at the sound. It was more soothing than the sound of wind chimes.

She pulled him closer. "Thank you for protecting me from Bella's wrath."

"Anytime, hon." She purred as he let his Southern accent show. "Now while we're alone...", he pulled out the crumpled list from his pocket. "What do you say we... number five?"

Alice stared at the long numbered list, while her innocent pout turned into a wicked grin.

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Anyway, hope you liked this alternate ending to the story! Bear with me for having to change the ending to Chapter 1. :)


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